Archive for July, 2008

Sieve’n on the run… Vancouver should be fun.

Friday, July 18th, 2008

That’s right folks. The Sieve will be gracing the city of Vancouver with his presence next week. And just so that he doesn’t kick my ass too hard for not getting around to this FG business, I’m going to throw something up to save face.

In case you’re wondering, that’s Dallas Stars’ Mike Modano on the left and Jon (Napoleon Dynamite) Heder on the right. I’m not sure if Heder used Modano as his inspiration while preparing for his part in Blades of Glory, but his likeness to the long in the tooth (literally) NHL veteran is noted. Either way, they both look like 15 year old girls… but not hot.

- Coach Mitch Mitchel

Has Mike Toth lost his mind?

Wednesday, July 16th, 2008

Former Ottawa Senators goaltender Ray Emery, pictured above, recently signed a one-year contract to play for Atlant Mytishchi of the Russian Continental Hockey League. The deal came after the Sens bought out Emery’s contract and he failed to generate any interest in his services from other NHL teams. Why is that? According to Sportsnet personality Mike Toth, the NHL is racist:

[T]here’s a hint of racism in the air. Canada is becoming more multi-cultural by the day, especially in major cities. But for the most part, the hockey culture is still predominantly white and many NHL power brokers grew up in a Canada that was completely different. Unlike their compatriots in the NBA, NFL and Major League Baseball, NHL general managers don’t have any experience dealing with the Allen Iverson’s of the sports world. Many black people have their own distinct culture and when a guy like Emery walks into a dressing room with his flashy clothes and hip-hop spirit, some hockey people tend to raise their eyebrows.

Firstly, yet another link to Bob the Angry Flower’s excellent guide to the correct use of the apostrophe. Sorry, it’s a pet peeve. Secondly, yes, I’m sure the fact that no other team wanted Emery had nothing at all to do with his spotty play, off-ice incidents, inability to show up on time for practice or general douchebaggery. Nothing at all.

Here’s the news: Ray Emery enjoyed a great deal of latitude in Ottawa. He was a rock star after his 2007 playoff performance, and he acted like it. Big new contract, partying, flashy clothes, Lamborghinis – all to the detriment of his on-ice performance. All probably would have been forgiven had he continued to play well. But he didn’t. He posted a dismal 12-13-4 record with a 3.13 goals-against average and .890 save percentage in 31 games. That sucks in any pro league.

If his antics weren’t such a big deal, as Toth implies with his comparisons to other players who were picked up by other teams after their shenanigans, why did Emery feel compelled to appear on Michael Landsberg’s “Off the Record” and pretty much admit guilt? “I just didn’t uphold my end of the deal,” Emery said. “It was me that had a little stupid sideshow going.”

Even that mea culpa was half-assed. Regarding his problems with keeping time: “I’m not the guy who’s really nervous about being late. I kind of get there and do my thing.”

Fuck, buddy, your career is on the line, you’re paid millions of dollars, and you can’t be bothered to show up on time? Piss off. Despite what Toth says, Emery is hardly the impact player Allen Iverson is, and he needs to work at practice or he won’t play well. It’s that simple.

The Senators were well within their rights to buy Emery out, and the other teams owe him no obligation of employment. It’s not like they collectively decided to exile him to Russia because he’s black. It has nothing to do with the colour of his skin and everything to do with the fact he’s an underachieving pain in the ass.

And if Toth wants to accuse others of racism, he might want to lay off the “Comrade” cracks about Russia, which hasn’t been a communist country in numerous years, as well as his implication in the passage quoted above that them darkies aren’t like us and should be treated differently. Probably not his best options for a convincing argument.

- The Sieve

So long, Nazzy

Friday, July 4th, 2008

If you follow the Canucks, you already know captain Markus Naslund signed a free-agent contract with the New York Rangers on Thursday, ending a stint that saw him become the highest scoring player in franchise history.

We’re not really sure what we can add at this point, except to say we think it was a huge mistake on new GM Mike Gillis’s part to let Naslund go. You can’t blame Naslund for signing in New York. Gillis didn’t even make him an offer, and who wouldn’t want to be a millionaire in Manhattan?

So, um, yeah. If you want to read moronic fan commentary, go here. If you want to have your tears jerked, read this. If you want a laugh, here’s where you’ll find it.

As for us, we’ll be at the bar. It’s Stampede Friday in Calgary, so at least we have an excuse to be there before noon.

- The Sieve